Before starting to read this article please make sure to read my previous article from last week entitled "Are you fearful, anxious, depressed, or addicted? There is Hope!". In that article, I implored you to examine the source of fear, anxiety, depression, or addiction which is the sense of powerlessness or hopelessness. I then asked that you keep a journal to write down all the feelings that tend to cause you fear, feed an addiction, or lead to depression or anxiety. If you have not started that process I would urge you to do so today.
Once you have started the process above it is important to know that you can absolutely change the way you feel. We all understand that we can learn new things. Some of us have learned to play an instrument or are talented artists. Some have learned to make finely crafted furniture or to knit a beautiful blanket. Some of us have also learned bad habits or addictive behaviors. We all know that mastery of the particular positive skills that we have developed took hundreds and sometimes thousands of hours of practice. However, few of us stop to think about how we can change our thinking patterns or that we can learn new thinking behaviors. We tend to think that our thoughts and feelings are on autopilot or that we were born with them and that the only way to change them is through medications or by trying to suppress them. While for a minority of us medications may be necessary, the vast majority of us have the ability to create new ways of thinking that are empowering, energizing, grateful, loving, and giving. It starts by realizing that we are in charge and have the power. One of the biggest things that I have realized from my examining my own thinking patterns and from talking to patients is that is very easy to feel powerless when dealing with depression, anxiety, or habits. It may seem that there is no way out of the feelings they we are having and this makes us feel even more depressed or fearful. I have felt this way myself. But it doesn't have to be this way. We are not powerless. Powerlessness is a myth that we tell ourselves that prevents us from making the necessary changes in our lives. While we may have developed this myth to help protect us as children so that we would fit into our family or tribe, it no longer serves as adults. These patterns, which were once self-preserving, are now self- destructive. So how we can we start to change our thinking patterns? In my experience, there is nothing that will have more impact on our lives than what we think. How we perceive our life experience will in large part determine our happiness. But this doesn't mean that we should suppress bad thoughts. Thought suppression may make these thought patterns worse. In my view, it means creating new thought patterns that are empowering. It means seeing the abundance of goodness that is already in you and around us instead of the seeing the scarcity of badness in our lives and in others. There is really nothing bad in our lives. There are only results. Every event in our lives can be perceived as an opportunity to learn and grow and give. We can thrive no matter what the circumstance. When I think about how many blessings I have in my life at any one moment I usually can find at least 99 things that are going good for every one thing that is perceived as inconvenient. Yet, I have found that most of us including myself tend to focus on the negative one thing and disregard all the rest. We tend to disregard the abundance in our lives and focus on the scarcity. I have a daily reminder of this in one of my bathrooms in my house. In that bathroom there are three light bulbs. Two are burning brightly and one is burned out. I could easily focus on the burned out bulb but instead I have left that bulb in place to serve as a reminder to focus on the things that are burning brightly in my own life. The great news is that there are some practical ways to start down the road to appreciation. A good place to start is to begin a daily ritual of being grateful and appreciative of all the things that are going right. I start every morning by spending 5-15 minutes meditating about things I am grateful for. I do the same thing in the evening. Being grateful starts with appreciating the simple things in our lives like the beating of our heart, the ability to breath, the feeling in our bodies, or the simple necessities that we enjoy like food or clothing. We can think about the wonderful experiences we are having or have had in the past that have made a great impact for the good in our lives. It is also helpful to visualize how we will continue to thrive no matter what happens in the future. Shorter versions of this practice can be utilized throughout the day whenever we begin to experience self-doubt, anxiety, or fear. Some people even have gratefulness reminders like beads that they leave in their bedroom and before they go to bed they count the things that they were grateful for that day. With this practice I caution you to not have expectations or need of immediate and permanent changes in your outlook. Learning to change your outlook from one of expectation to appreciation is a process and most people tend to overestimate what can be accomplished in a short period but underestimate what can be accomplished over a long period. We all want immediate results but persistence is the key. It is okay to want and desire change but it can be self-defeating to have a self-imposed timeframe for certain changes to occur. With this in mind, I now tell patients when they come for weight loss that it is great that they desire and want to lose weight and they certainly will if they follow the daily process. However, they should not expect an absolutely certain amount of weight to be lost by a certain time. Nobody has control over how much weight they will lose. The same is true with any change in our lives including our thoughts. In conclusion, I want to express to my wife and kids how appreciative I am for them. I have experienced unconditional love from my wife that has saved my life. Her encouraging words have kept me going in times when the path ahead seemed untenable. Her patience has been extraordinary and her love and compassion for others has been a great example for me. My children are all great in their own ways. They each have the shining light of unconditional love that has helped show me how to love others. They bring great joy to my life. For those looking for a good example of a morning exercise that I have personally found to be very helpful go to the following link provided by Tony Robbins. For those looking to improve their health or need assistance feel free to call our office. Otherwise, the time is now to have a great day!
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Our brain learns through our experiences to promote pleasure and avoid pain. For example, we learn to avoid the hot stove after we experience the pain, smell the burning skin, and see the blister. This experience is reinforced for us by having daily painful reminders as the burn heals. Conversely, our minds crave the pleasure that comes from activities such as eating a great meal, sex, doing a physical activity, or feeling or giving love.
To this day I can remember vividly falling off my bike as a child and landing on my face on the pavement. This experience left a scar on my face and an imprint on my brain. We also have emotional scars that are even more powerful. I remember an experience when I was trying to learn how to water-ski and I wasn't as successful as some of my brothers or cousins. I couldn’t get up out of the water very well and I struggled. I was also constantly compared to them. I think my family members were trying to motivate me through competition or sibling rivalry. However, I translated these comparisons into feeling unworthy, inadequate, and unlovable. As a result, I avoided learning to water-ski until I was much older so I would not have to face the pain of my own feelings of inadequacy. All of us have these moments. With this in mind, it is helpful to remember that our brain is primarily concerned with preserving us and the species. Otherwise, mankind would not have been here as long as it has. We are largely thriving as a species because we have a strong propagating and preserving instinct. We also have a large "thinking" brain that sets us apart from all other species and allows us to make real choices. This part of our brain allows us to make choices that can even contradict the preserving and propagating part of our brain. The "old" or as some people like to call it the "reptilian" brain is largely set on automatic and we have little control over it. This part of our brain is the area of the brain stem that is responsible for regulating our heart and respiratory rate without any conscious effort on our part. It is also the part of the brain that we would sometimes like to shut off but it is important to know that we cannot. The impulses that come from this part of the brain will always be there. These impulses may be able to be modulated or overridden to a certain degree but they cannot be totally removed. Nor should they be as our life depends upon it. Any addict will probably tell you that they would probably love to shut their brains down in an attempt to heal their addiction. The sex addict would like to remove their sexual impulses, the food addict would like to shut down their appetite, the alcoholic would like to shut off their opioid receptors, and the list could go on and on. We are all addicts in our own little ways. It is just that some addictions are more socially acceptable than others. One of the more off-the-wall addictions that I have encountered is the one recorded by a popular addiction expert Dr. Gabor Mate in his book "In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts" who admitted he was addicted to the purchasing of classic music CDs. It is key to remember that for most of us the fear, anxiety, depression, and addictive behaviors we experience in life come as a result of our brain trying to preserve us. It is pain based. It is an attempt to respond to deep and searing physical or emotional experiences from our past and present. They are attempts by the brain to prevent us from taking an action that could result in suffering or even more powerfully in the case of addiction promote activities that are certain to bring pleasure and cover over pain at least temporarily. The problem is that these solutions tend to run out of steam. In my experience, people that try to avoid life "stressors" because of a desire to feel completely safe often tend to be either depressed or anxious. This is because there is no safety or security in life. There is virtually no activity in life that is 100 % safe or secure all of the time. Eventually, the list of safe activities that are tolerable for avoiders dwindles down and down until, for some, they cannot leave the house or even their bed. The bed becomes the last safe zone. Thus, some people that avoid things tend to become more and more reclusive over time. The same happens for addicts. The addictive activity tends to be less effective over time at masking the pain that is underneath and more and more of the activity is required. That is why for an addict it doesn't matter how much of something they have. They could have 15 million dollars or 150 million dollars of discretionary spending. They could have sex or be watching pornography and then 30 minutes later be desiring more. It doesn't matter. Both of these activities bring painful consequences for the person and acting on these impulses and thoughts bring diminishing returns over time. They also impair our ability to magnify our true potential and to help others because as we grow personally our competency and ability to serve others also grows. So how do we begin the road to overcoming fear or addiction? The first thing to realize is that you are a unique and special person worthy of feeling loved and capable of changing your patterns of behavior. You can definitely be successful as you work on confronting your fears and addictions. One potential starting point in beginning the process to overcoming your fears or addictions is to find the source of the pain that these behaviors are attempting to mask. Some people may say that they behave in a certain way because they are masking the pain of a divorce, death of a close family member, loss of childhood, having an abusive father, or a mother who didn't care. On a more surface level these may be some of reasons but they are not the deepest reasons. According to Gary Zukav, the deeper reasons that are important to uncover include "feeling inadequate to be in the world, a pain of feeling ugly inside, a pain of wanting to belong and not belonging, a pain of needing to love and feeling that you are not capable of loving, the pain of needing to be loved and knowing that you are unlovable. It is the pain of feeling defective, inherently flawed, broken and not worth repairing. It's not wanting others to see as you really are inside yourself because they wouldn't want to have anything to do with you if they did." Gary Zukav goes on to say that this pain is the "pain of powerlessness" and "that everybody has it...Every frightened part of your personality strives to cover that pain of powerlessness. So when you become angry, for example, and when you shout or when you withdraw emotionally you are attempting to mask from yourself the pain of powerlessness, the pain of the world not being the way you want it to be, and what the frightened parts of your personality need the world to be in order to feel safe and valuable." I have personally found it very powerful to write in a journal all the things that tend to get me anxious, depressed, fearful and any addictive tendencies that I may have. I would urge you to do the same. I would then ask yourself why you experience these emotions and try to get as deep as you can. You can follow this exercise with asking yourself if these fears are well founded or exaggerated? Are they empowering or immobilizing in the present? If they are immobilizing then they are holding you back. Finally, I know that there is hope for everyone to greatly benefit from this process and there is support out there if you need it. Please consult with your physician for additional support before engaging in this activity or feel free to call if you have any questions or would like to schedule a consultation. Stay tuned for more articles to come in the following months on this subject. The majority of us could stand to lose a little weight. Weight loss can improve our physical health, appearance, and mental/spiritual outlook.
I know that when I loss weight and eat healthier that I feel better and have much more energy. I sleep better and have a better outlook on life. But does our body and brain agree that weight loss is a good thing? One of the common concerns I get from patients in regards to diet and weight loss is that they will enter the so-called "starvation mode." It is true that both our brains and bodies respond to weight loss by trying to conserve energy by reducing the number of calories that we burn. We can also feel hungrier and lethargic. This normal response of the body is often called "starvation mode." Whenever we limit our calories our body adapts to try to keep us at a stable weight. This stable weight is different for all of us and may change over time. It is also key to remember that as we lose weight our calorie expenditure will also decrease just based on the fact that we are lighter. It requires less energy to move a smaller frame. Most people also lose some muscle mass with weight loss which also decreases our basal metabolic rate. So how can we overcome "starvation mode"? The more and more I work with patients and learn from my own experience I have come up with a few tricks to limit starvation mode. 1. Lift Weights or High Intensity Exercise: Resistance training has been shown to help limit decreases in muscle mass and our metabolic rate that can come during weight loss. Strength training can also increase our metabolic rate when we are not losing weight. 2. Taking Breaks: Our bodies respond quickly to changes in our environment. If our body senses a consistent caloric restriction then it may respond by decreasing our metabolic rate. One way to possibly combat this is to eat normal calorie amounts for short periods followed by periods of caloric restriction. 3. Fasting: The more and more I have practiced and studied fasting I have come to see it as a powerful tool in the weight loss and/or health arsenal. Some studies have shown that fasting can actually increase our metabolic rate as opposed to decreasing it. This may come as a surprise to some but it actually makes sense. Our bodies know that we cannot decrease our metabolic rate to zero. Our bodies also know that if we are "starving" that we need to have energy to find food. This means that our metabolic rate will increase. There are various types of fasting which can help including intermittent and sustained periods of fasting. Starvation Mode is Real! The bottom line is that starvation mode is a real phenomena but the fear of starvation mode should not stop us from trying to live healthier. Fortunately, there are helpful strategies that can assist us during our weight loss journey. I am happy to help guide you through this process. Before considering any diet or weight loss regimen please consult your personal physician. We all know that it is important to get exercise. The benefits of exercise are myriad. I personally get not only physical benefits but I also get profound mental and spiritual benefits as well.
But how much do we need to exercise? The National Institutes of Health (NIH) recommends at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise a week. This equates to 30 minutes per day if you exercise 5 times a week. The NIH also recommends that you can do 75 minutes of vigorous activity per week in lieu of moderate-intensity exercise. Despite these recommendations there is more evidence that shorter periods of high-intensity exercise are equivalent to long periods of moderate-intensity exercise. In a prior article I wrote last year I reviewed a study that compared two groups of young men. These men were not in shape to begin with and they all completed 3 sessions of exercise per week for 12 weeks. One group did 45 minutes of moderate activity exercise on a stationary bike. The other group only did 1 minute of all-out exercise within a 10-minute time commitment. By the end of the study both groups showed equivalent improvements in peak oxygen activity, insulin sensitivity, and skeletal muscle performance. Both groups had an increase in endurance by about 20 percent. However, they were not equivalent in terms of total time commitment. The moderate activity group spent 27 hours on the bike whereas the high-intensity group only spent 6 hours with only 36 minutes of that time being strenuous. So what do I do? My personal favorite high-intensity activity is sprints. I enjoy doing sprints because it gets me outdoors which I feel is also important. What I do is pretty simple. My neighborhood is one big circle. I simply do 4-5 all out sprints with short walking breaks between the sprints and stop when I get back to my house. It takes me about 10-15 minutes total. I try to do this about 2 times per week. That's it! Of course, you can do all sorts of other activities that mimic this process depending on the health of your joints and ability to do vigorous activity. For those looking to get healthy this summer feel free to reach out and schedule a consultation. Otherwise, before starting any sort of exercise routine please consult with your physician. Now that school has ended for our kids and the heat of summer is fast approaching, it is a great time to focus on your health and fitness.
I personally have a love/hate relationship with diet and exercise. At some points in my life I have been very overweight and unhealthy and at other points I have been thin and energetic. This is true for a lot of us. I have lost 70 lbs twice in my life so I am very familiar with how difficult it is too maintain a healthy body weight. I have purposefully kept my drivers license picture that was taken when I was at my peak weight to serve as a reminder of my weight loss journey. For a few years I have been proponent and practitioner of the low carb and high fat (LCHF) diet. This type of diet is also called the Ketogenic diet which is not to be confused with Atkins or South Beach diet. These other diets contain a lot more protein especially in the form of meat. A true ketogenic diet only contains a low to moderate amount of protein and the focus is more on eating vegetables and healthy fats and very few carbohydrates. The typical ketogenic is composed of 65-80 % fat calories. Other things that I have incorporated is both intermittent and long periods of fasting. I have fasted for over a week consuming nothing but water and supplements. I am also a big fan of high intensity training (HIT) and strength training. While not for everyone I enjoy doing sets of all-out sprints. The evidence shows that just 10 minutes of HIT is essentially equivalent to 60 minutes of moderate intensity activity like jogging or cycling. Recently, I have seen a significant surge of interest from patients that are inquiring about the ketogenic diet or other ways to help with weight loss or to live healthier. In my experience the ketogenic diet can be tricky and it will definitely help to have someone like myself serve as a coach through the process. Since I have personally experimented with many diet and weight loss strategies I can help those that are interested in taking control of their health. To get you started on your weight loss journey it helps to start simple. One of my favorite meals is composed of 1 avocado, salsa, 1 lime, and a pinch of salt. I start with putting an avocado in a bowel and slice it up as small as possible. I then add the salsa, lime, and salt and mix it up thoroughly. I typically eat about half of it and save the rest for later in the day or the next day. The avocado provides a lot of healthy fats, fiber, and potassium. In conclusion, before doing the ketogenic diet or any of the strategies I have discussed above please consult with your physician first. If you have any questions or would like to learn more feel free to give me a call or send an email. |
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June 2022
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